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How to describe G.W.Bush's actions to a child (long story)
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goodisonpark



Joined: 12 Jun 2003
Posts: 193

PostPosted: Fri Jul 04, 2003 9:05 am    Post subject: How to describe G.W.Bush's actions to a child (long story) Reply with quote

>Q. Daddy, why did we have to attack Iraq?

>

>A: Because they had weapons of mass destruction.

>

>Q: But the inspectors didn't find any weapons of mass destruction.

>

>A: That's because the Iraqis were hiding them.

>

>Q: And that's why we invaded Iraq?

>

>A: Yep. Invasions always work better than inspections.

>

>Q: But after we invaded them, we STILL didn't find any weapons of mass

>destruction,

>did we?

>

>A: That's because the weapons are so well hidden. Don't worry, we'll find

>something,

>probably right before the 2004 election.

>

>Q: Why did Iraq want all those weapons of mass destruction?

>

>A: To use them in a war, silly.

>

>Q: I'm confused. If they had all those weapons that they planned to use in a

>war, then

>why didn't they use any of those weapons when we went to war with them?

>

>A: Well, obviously they didn't want anyone to know they had those weapons,

>so they chose

>to die by the thousands rather than defend themselves.

>

>Q: That doesn't make sense. Why would they choose to die if they had all

>those big

>weapons with which they could have fought back?

>

>A: It's a different culture. It's not supposed to make sense.

>

>Q: I don't know about you, but I don't think they had any of those weapons

>our

>government said they did.

>

>A: Well, you know, it doesn't matter whether or not they had those weapons.

>We had

>another good reason to invade them anyway.

>

>Q: And what was that?

>

>A: Even if Iraq didn't have weapons of mass destruction, Saddam Hussein was

>a cruel

>dictator, which is another good reason to invade another country.

>

>Q: Why? What does a cruel dictator do that makes it OK to invade his

>country?

>

>A: Well, for one thing, he tortured his own people.

>

>Q: Kind of like what they do in China?

>

>A: Don't go comparing China to Iraq. China is a good economic competitor,

>where millions

>of people work for slave wages in sweatshops to make U.S. corporations

>richer.

>

>Q: So if a country lets its people be exploited for American corporate gain,

>it's a good

>country, even if that country tortures people?

>

>A: Right.

>

>Q: Why were people in Iraq being tortured?

>

>A: For political crimes, mostly, like criticizing the government. People who

>criticized

>the government in Iraq were sent to prison and tortured.

>

>Q: Isn't that exactly what happens in China?

>

>A: I told you, China is different.

>

>Q: What's the difference between China and Iraq?

>

>A: Well, for one thing, Iraq was ruled by the Ba'ath party, while China is

>Communist.

>

>Q: Didn't you once tell me Communists were bad?

>

>A: No, just Cuban Communists are bad.

>

>Q: How are the Cuban Communists bad?

>

>A: Well, for one thing, people who criticize the government in Cuba are sent

>to prison

>and tortured.

>

>Q: Like in Iraq?

>

>A: Exactly.

>

>Q: And like in China, too?

>

>A: I told you, China's a good economic competitor. Cuba, on the other hand,

>is not.

>

>Q: How come Cuba isn't a good economic competitor?

>

>A: Well, you see, back in the early 1960s, our government passed some laws

>that made

>it illegal for Americans to trade or do any business with Cuba until they

>stopped

>being Communists and started being capitalists like us.

>

>Q: But if we got rid of those laws, opened up trade with Cuba, and started

>doing

>business with them, wouldn't that help the Cubans become capitalists?

>

>A: Don't be a smart-ass.

>

>Q: I didn't think I was being one.

>

>A: Well, anyway, they also don't have freedom of religion in Cuba.

>

>Q: Kind of like China and the Falun Gong movement?

>

>A: I told you, stop saying bad things about China. Anyway, Saddam Hussein

>came to

>power through a military coup, so he's not really a legitimate leader

>anyway.

>

>Q: What's a military coup?

>

>A: That's when a military general takes over the government of a country by

>force,

>instead of holding free elections like we do in the United States.

>

>Q: Didn't the ruler of Pakistan come to power by a military coup?

>

>A: You mean General Pervez Musharraf? Uh, yeah, he did, but Pakistan is our

>friend.

>

>Q: Why is Pakistan our friend if their leader is illegitimate?

>

>A: I never said Pervez Musharraf was illegitimate.

>

>Q: Didn't you just say a military general who comes to power by forcibly

>overthrowing

>the legitimate government of a nation is an illegitimate leader?

>

>A: Only Saddam Hussein. Pervez Musharraf is our friend, because he helped us

>invade

>Afghanistan.

>

>Q: Why did we invade Afghanistan?

>

>A: Because of what they did to us on September 11th.

>

>Q: What did Afghanistan do to us on September 11th?

>

>A: Well, on September 11th, nineteen men - fifteen of them Saudi Arabians -

>hijacked

>four airplanes and flew three of them into buildings in New York and

>Washington,

>killing 3,000 innocent people.

>

>Q: So how did Afghanistan figure into all that?

>

>A: Afghanistan was where those bad men trained, under the oppressive rule of

>the Taliban.

>

>Q: Aren't the Taliban those bad radical Islamics who chopped off people's

>heads and hands?

>

>A: Yes, that's exactly who they were. Not only did they chop off people's

>heads and hands,

>but they oppressed women, too.

>

>Q: Didn't the Bush administration give the Taliban 43 million dollars back

>in May of 2001?

>

>A: Yes, but that money was a reward because they did such a good job

>fighting drugs.

>

>Q: Fighting drugs?

>

>A: Yes, the Taliban were very helpful in stopping people from growing opium

>poppies.

>

>Q: How did they do such a good job?

>

>A: Simple. If people were caught growing opium poppies, the Taliban would

>have their

>hands and heads cut off.

>

>Q: So, when the Taliban cut off people's heads and hands for growing

>flowers, that was

>OK, but not if they cut people's heads and hands off for other reasons?

>

>A: Yes. It's OK with us if radical Islamic fundamentalists cut off people's

>hands for

>growing flowers, but it's cruel if they cut off people's hands for stealing

>bread.

>

>Q: Don't they also cut off people's hands and heads in Saudi Arabia?

>

>A: That's different. Afghanistan was ruled by a tyrannical patriarchy that

>oppressed

>women and forced them to wear burqas whenever they were in public, with

>death by

>stoning as the penalty for women who did not comply.

>

>Q: Don't Saudi women have to wear burqas in public, too?

>

>A: No, Saudi women merely wear a traditional Islamic body covering.

>

>Q: What's the difference?

>

>A: The traditional Islamic covering worn by Saudi women is a modest yet

>fashionable

>garment that covers all of a woman's body except for her eyes and fingers.

>The burqa,

>on the other hand, is an evil tool of patriarchal oppression that covers all

>of a

>woman's body except for her eyes and fingers.

>

>Q: It sounds like the same thing with a different name.

>

>A: Now, don't go comparing Afghanistan and Saudi Arabia. The Saudis are our

>friends.

>

>Q: But I thought you said 15 of the 19 hijackers on September 11th were from

>Saudi Arabia.

>

>A: Yes, but they trained in Afghanistan.

>

>Q: Who trained them?

>

>A: A very bad man named Osama bin Laden.

>

>Q: Was he from Afghanistan?

>

>A: Uh, no, he was from Saudi Arabia too. But he was a bad man, a very bad

>man.

>

>Q: I seem to recall he was our friend once.

>

>A: Only when we helped him and the mujahadeen repel the Soviet invasion of

>Afghanistan

>back in the 1980s.

>

>Q: Who are the Soviets? Was that the Evil Communist Empire Ronald Reagan

>talked about?

>

>A: There are no more Soviets. The Soviet Union broke up in 1990 or

>thereabouts, and now

>they have elections and capitalism like us. We call them Russians now.

>

>Q: So the Soviets - I mean, the Russians - are now our friends?

>

>A: Well, not really. You see, they were our friends for many years after

>they stopped

>being Soviets, but then they decided not to support our invasion of Iraq, so

>we're mad

>at them now. We're also mad at the French and the Germans because they

>didn't help us

>invade Iraq either.

>

>Q: So the French and Germans are evil, too?

>

>A: Not exactly evil, but just bad enough that we had to rename French fries

>and French

>toast to Freedom Fries and Freedom Toast.

>

>Q: Do we always rename foods whenever another country doesn't do what we

>want them to do?

>

>A: No, we just do that to our friends. Our enemies, we invade.

>

>Q: But wasn't Iraq one of our friends back in the 1980s?

>

>A: Well, yeah. For a while.

>

>Q: Was Saddam Hussein ruler of Iraq back then?

>

>A: Yes, but at the time he was fighting against Iran, which made him our

>friend,

>temporarily.

>

>Q: Why did that make him our friend?

>

>A: Because at that time, Iran was our enemy.

>

>Q: Isn't that when he gassed the Kurds?

>

>A: Yeah, but since he was fighting against Iran at the time, we looked the

>other way,

>to show him we were his friend.

>

>Q: So anyone who fights against one of our enemies automatically becomes our

>friend?

>

>A: Most of the time, yes.

>

>Q: And anyone who fights against one of our friends is automatically an

>enemy?

>

>A: Sometimes that's true, too. However, if American corporations can profit

>by selling

>weapons to both sides at the same time, all the better.

>

>Q: Why?

>

>A: Because war is good for the economy, which means war is good for America.

>Also,

>since God is on America's side, anyone who opposes war is a godless

>unAmerican Communist.

>Do you understand now why we attacked Iraq?

>

>Q: I think so. We attacked them because God wanted us to, right?

>

>A: Yes.

>

>Q: But how did we know God wanted us to attack Iraq?

>

>A: Well, you see, God personally speaks to George W. Bush and tells him what

>to do.

>

>Q: So basically, what you're saying is that we attacked Iraq because George

>W. Bush hears

>voices in his head?

>

>A. Yes! You finally understand how the world works. Now close your eyes,

>make yourself

>comfortable, and go to sleep. Good night.

>

>Q: Good night, Daddy.



The world is your oyster but the future's a clam

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bbchris
Princess Of Hongkong


Joined: 01 Jan 2002
Posts: 11441
Location: Hong Kong

PostPosted: Fri Jul 04, 2003 9:39 am    Post subject: Re: How to describe G.W.Bush's actions to a child (long stor Reply with quote

hahahaha Excellent! :toc





|Blah Blah|Thinking Out Loud|Jane Eliz|
|Talk Soup |

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LarreeMP3



Joined: 12 Apr 2002
Posts: 1935

PostPosted: Fri Jul 04, 2003 2:26 pm    Post subject: Re: How to describe G.W.Bush's actions to a child (long stor Reply with quote

Re-elect Bush 2004!



The man has my vote! The only good terrorist is a dead terrorist!



Coming soon... Baghdad Disneyland!

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droolymutt
No Underblurb


Joined: 25 Jul 2002
Posts: 6721
Location: Montreal, Canada

PostPosted: Fri Jul 04, 2003 2:45 pm    Post subject: Re: How to describe G.W.Bush's actions to a child (long stor Reply with quote

brilliant, Goodison......



I saved that....









____________________________________________________________

"Re-elect Bush 2004!



The man has my vote! The only good terrorist is a dead terrorist!"

____________________________________________________________





uh. Isn't that a rather harsh thing to day about your own President?









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LarreeMP3



Joined: 12 Apr 2002
Posts: 1935

PostPosted: Fri Jul 04, 2003 3:38 pm    Post subject: Drooly, Drooly, Drooly.... Reply with quote

What the heck do they teach kids about America in the classrooms outside of America? Must be some pretty scary stuff!



Re-elect Bush in 2004

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bbchris
Princess Of Hongkong


Joined: 01 Jan 2002
Posts: 11441
Location: Hong Kong

PostPosted: Fri Jul 04, 2003 4:50 pm    Post subject: Re: Drooly, Drooly, Drooly.... Reply with quote

Well they teach them to be able to laugh at their own leaders and other world leaders when appropriate. Interestingly JFK never got ridiculed overseas. My Mum said she cried when she heard he'd been shot..........





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droolymutt
No Underblurb


Joined: 25 Jul 2002
Posts: 6721
Location: Montreal, Canada

PostPosted: Fri Jul 04, 2003 4:50 pm    Post subject: Re: Drooly, Drooly, Drooly.... Reply with quote

Outside the U.S. we get to see a little more non-American-censored-and-manipulated media.







Therefore the Global view comes from a very different perspective than that provided by CNN.







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LarreeMP3



Joined: 12 Apr 2002
Posts: 1935

PostPosted: Fri Jul 04, 2003 5:19 pm    Post subject: That is pathetic, Drooly. Reply with quote

I have THREE international news stands within walking distance from my pad. So don't tell me that our news is censored and manipulated. That is a lame, ignorant, and completely UNTRUE statement. We have access to EVERY perspective.

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LarreeMP3



Joined: 12 Apr 2002
Posts: 1935

PostPosted: Fri Jul 04, 2003 5:22 pm    Post subject: And Chris... Reply with quote

There is a HUGE difference between poking fun at our president and calling him a murderer and a terrorist. There is nothing funny about that at all.



YOU have mail!

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goodisonpark



Joined: 12 Jun 2003
Posts: 193

PostPosted: Fri Jul 04, 2003 5:54 pm    Post subject: Re: And Chris... Reply with quote

This thread was mention to be a laugh ........:seismo

The world is your oyster but the future's a clam

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LarreeMP3



Joined: 12 Apr 2002
Posts: 1935

PostPosted: Fri Jul 04, 2003 6:27 pm    Post subject: Your thread is cool. Reply with quote

I just feel obligated to defend my country. Especially on the 4th of July! No worries!

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sethr



Joined: 24 Mar 2003
Posts: 190

PostPosted: Fri Jul 04, 2003 7:23 pm    Post subject: Re: Drooly, Drooly, Drooly.... Reply with quote

What the heck do they teach kids about America in the classrooms outside of America? Must be some pretty scary stuff!



Yeah, the truth is really scaree, Laree.

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NumberOneWorld



Joined: 28 Jun 2002
Posts: 85

PostPosted: Fri Jul 04, 2003 10:12 pm    Post subject: Re: Drooly, Drooly, Drooly.... Reply with quote

that was great... though the thought of GW having children made me shiver...



i wrote this in the first days of the invasion....



RING!



Saddam: hello?

GWB: Hey it's george...

SH: Hey george ... how's it going?

GWB: is ok.. you?

SH: pretty good... listen you came pretty close to hitting my summer house last night... what's up?

GW: ya sorry about that... we have to make it look good... btw, did you catch Putin on tv? what a goof...

SH: lol... well you know we owe him a lot of money and he thinks he'll never see it now that you're online...

GW: lol.. got that right... france too.. kiss your dough goodbye boys! that will show them...

SH: so what's up for today?

GW: probably lob a few more missles at some stuff... see my speech last night?

SH: no sorry i missed it.. went to bed early

GW: ya me too, right after CNN left.. man those guys go on and on... it's like they never read the briefing....btw... how's your room?

SH: is ok... i wanted a whirlpool bath but they didn't have one.. is ok though, switzerland is very nice this time of year... hold.. i have another call........ it's sharron... got to take it... call me back

GW: k....





the rest of it is here

Mb

thewireweb

NumberOneWorld

AroundRecords


KnowAboutNetwork

The Bulletin Board

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LarreeMP3



Joined: 12 Apr 2002
Posts: 1935

PostPosted: Fri Jul 04, 2003 11:48 pm    Post subject: If Gore was president I would be... Reply with quote

...defending him as hard as I am defending Bush in the international arena.



Can't help it. That's just the way I am!



:gl

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droolymutt
No Underblurb


Joined: 25 Jul 2002
Posts: 6721
Location: Montreal, Canada

PostPosted: Sat Jul 05, 2003 12:38 am    Post subject: Re: If Gore was president I would be... Reply with quote

Larree, I don't wanna fight you again on this, but there's a basic issue here I don't understand.





Would you support a leader, even if you knew in your heart that what they're doing is wrong?



I mean - there's a lot to be said for thinking patriotism and solidarity and loyalty....



But if it becomes unquestioning following of leaders....



Isn't that wrong?









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