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JPzBeenjamin
Joined: 06 Nov 2003 Posts: 126
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Posted: Tue Jan 06, 2004 4:51 pm Post subject: An Attorneys take on Xmas |
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"The Night Before Christmas"
Whereas, on or about the night prior to Christmas, there did occur at a
certain improved piece of real property (hereinafter "the House") a
general lack of stirring by all creatures therein, including, but not
limited to a mouse.
A variety of foot apparel, e.g., stocking, socks, etc., had been affixed
by and around the chimney in said House in the hope and/or belief that
St. Nick a/k/a/ St. Nicholas a/k/a/ Santa Claus (hereinafter "Claus")
would arrive at sometime thereafter. The minor residents, i.e. the
children, of the aforementioned House were located in their individual
beds and were engaged in nocturnal hallucinations, i.e. dreams, wherein
vision of confectionery treats, including, but not limited to, candies,
nuts and/or sugar plums, did dance, cavort and otherwise appear in said
dreams.
Whereupon the party of the first part (sometimes hereinafter referred to
as ("I"), being the joint-owner in fee simple of the House with the
party of the second part (hereinafter "Mamma"), and said Mamma had
retired for a sustained period of sleep. (At such time, the parties were
clad in various forms of headgear, e.g., kerchief and cap.
Suddenly, and without prior notice or warning, there did occur upon the
unimproved real property adjacent and appurtenant to said House, i.e.,
the lawn, a certain disruption of unknown nature, cause and/or
circumstance. The party of the first part did immediately rush to a
window in the House to investigate the cause of such disturbance.
At that time, the party of the first part did observe, with some degree
of wonder and/or disbelief, a miniature sleigh (hereinafter "the
Vehicle") being pulled and/or drawn very rapidly through the air by
approximately eight ( reindeer. The driver of the Vehicle appeared to
be and in fact was, the previously referenced Claus.
Said Claus was providing specific direction, instruction and guidance to
the approximately eight ( reindeer and specifically identified the
said creatures by name: Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid,
Donner and Blitzen (hereinafter "the Deer").
The party of the first part witnessed Claus, the Vehicle and the Deer
intentionally and willfully trespass upon the roofs of several
residences located adjacent to and in the vicinity of the House, and
noted that the Vehicle was heavily laden with packages, toys and other
items of unknown origin or nature. Suddenly, without prior invitation or
permission, either express or implied, the Vehicle arrived at the House,
and Claus entered said House via the chimney.
Said Claus was clad in a red fur suit, which was partially covered with
residue from the chimney, and he carried a large sack containing a
portion of the aforementioned packages, toys, and other unknown items.
He was smoking what appeared to be tobacco in a small pipe in violation
of local ordinances and health regulations.
Claus did not speak, but immediately began to fill the stocking of the
children with toys and small gifts. (Said items did not, however,
constitute "gifts" pursuant to the Internal Revenue Code.)
Upon completion of the said task, Claus touched the side of his nose and
flew, rose and/or ascended up the chimney of the House to the roof where
the Vehicle and Deer waited. Claus immediately departed for an unknown
destination.
However, prior to departing the scene, I did hear Claus state and/or
exclaim:
"Merry Christmas!" or words to that effect.
Happy New Year All
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bbchris Princess Of Hongkong
Joined: 01 Jan 2002 Posts: 11441 Location: Hong Kong
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JPzBeenjamin
Joined: 06 Nov 2003 Posts: 126
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bbchris Princess Of Hongkong
Joined: 01 Jan 2002 Posts: 11441 Location: Hong Kong
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JPzBeenjamin
Joined: 06 Nov 2003 Posts: 126
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bbchris Princess Of Hongkong
Joined: 01 Jan 2002 Posts: 11441 Location: Hong Kong
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